|The Positive Principle Show|
This week I was asked which Positive Principle that I have learned would I see myself implementing the most in my life. I have to say for me it is a definite tie between "You are the architect of your life" and What is your story". Knowing that you have the ability to design your life the way you want to and knowing that you have the power to rewrite your story and accomplish what you want by using positivity is such an incredible tool. However, it just dawned on me that I certainly need to remember the rest of the principles and use them regularly because they are so important as well. To be able to design your life and change your story you also need love, you need to take action and you need to teach and be taught. You are going to have bad days and chaos in your life so you need to find your "beingness" and peace in it all and you need to recognize how far you've come.
Certain circumstances have yet to happen, but I know they are going to. It is not a dream anymore, it is a fact, it is my reality. I am leaving my job shortly, packing the important essentials, and of course my livelihood (the makeup kit) and moving across the country to create a better life. So in terms of how far I've come, because I am still in the process of it all, on the outside it appears as if I haven't gotten very far; however on the inside I have traveled around the entire world three times already.
I have learned so much and have come so far in the sense that I have practiced and learned so many new things to enhance my life. One thing I've learned for sure is to put yourself out there and to take chances. The best chance I have taken in a long long time was about two months ago. I had just gotten out of work, it was 10:30pm and I was exhausted and depressed and something just told me "you have to send a video to The Positive Principle Show; go ahead, change your life; just do it". So I took my phone, made the video, and well here I am 8 weeks later writing my final blog for the show. I have to thank Max and Polly for choosing me to be a part of this amazing experience; I am forever grateful to be a part of something where I learned an amazing way of life and I am deeply appreciative that I got to experience it with amazing people. Mary Beth, Heather, Jack and I all seem to be very different, but we all had the same goal, which was to change our lives for the better. I hope we've influenced others watching the show to want to do the same. I am also grateful for Tricia who was kind enough to share her wisdom and experience with us. This journey will forever be in my heart and soul.
Everyone has their own definition of peace. One person's peace can be another person's chaos; someone's chaos can be that one person's peace. This week's lesson is all about finding what keeps you at peace. Well because I have experienced so much chaos this week between my job, people in my life, and trying to move across country, believe it or not, I now know what peace is to me.
To me, peace is being some place where you are appreciated. Peace is working a job that you're passionate about. Peace is speaking your mind, despite the majority's opinion, whether they agree or disagree. It is about sticking up for yourself and keeping the people who aren't interested in what you're interested in, who don't speak about what you speak about, and who don't conduct themselves the way you conduct yourself, at a distance. Peace is certainly drifting yourself away from those who no longer serve you or your life in any positive way, and finding and surrounding yourself with those who do.
Now that I realize what peace is to me, to spiritually gravitate toward my beingness of peace, I am continuing to meditate and focus on what I am thankful for in life. It is hard for me to stay quiet for a second, let alone five minutes (laugh out loud), but I'm getting used to it. I love writing, so I write down five to ten things (sometimes more) of what I am thankful for in my favorite journal.
I trust Polly and Max, so I will continue to use these tools and I know it won't be long until I actually feel the peace I wish I had this past week.
If you were to ask me to tell you my story as it right now, I wouldn't want to. I wouldn't want to because it is not the story I wrote. My ego and the evil voice inside my head teamed up and wrote the story as it is so far. The hardest part to swallow is that it they are indeed part of me and wrote the story I bare to live right now. If you were to crack open my storybook from the past to the present you would find that its pages filled with self-sabotage. It is filled with self doubt and negative thinking - "I'm not pretty enough, not talented enough, not good enough, etc." It consists of me attracting the wrong things and the wrong, unsupportive people. It is me always thinking that I needed someone else to help get the things I want in life because I wasn't lucky enough to get noticed or to attract it myself. There are plenty of times where I wanted something very badly and prayed, hoped and wished, thinking I was being positive and I would get it; and then just to have it later dangled right in front of my face as if someone was waving a fillet mignon in front of a lion and then not giving it to them. Some of those times, even watching someone else get it right in front of me, all inside a town where the majority of the people live a negative lifestyle, who when I tell them my dreams say, "that will never happen", "you'll never get anywhere near that", "you will never get that" or "who do you think you are". Well sorry ego, I am taking the pen out of your hand and burning a fire through this bullshit story you write because this is where your turmoil ends and MY story begins.
I would like to start my story with "Once Upon A Time" but stories are fiction and mine will be purely nonfiction, so let's call it my reality. In my reality, from now on, I am going to forgive myself for beating myself down so now I can love and build myself up. I now know my ego may be a part of me, but it does not run my life; it is a factor I will do my best to ignore at its worst moments. No matter what the circumstance, no matter what anyone tells me, I know I am good enough for anyone or anything. I am going to attract the right things, the right people, the things and people that I want and deserve. I am not going to believe in luck anymore or feel that I need someone with connections or better luck to attract half of what I want because I believe that I will attract 100% of what I want all on my own. I am going to continue to pray and hope for what I want, but I will also think, say, feel, and believe that I will get it. I am going to be the lion that gets fed and not care what the other animals get. I am going to live in a place surrounded by successful people or people striving to be successful in what they do so they will believe that anything is possible, as well.
Of course, not everything in my reality will be rainbows and flowers, but I have the mindset to skate through those times gracefully. In my reality, from here on out, I will be open to all good vibes. My reality is filled with receiving amazing opportunities that I thought I would never get and ones I never even thought of.
From traveling, to applying for jobs, to making connections, and of course enjoying my vacation, its safe to say this week was an eventful one! Unfortunately, it was also a frustrating one. While I made countless connections with people who have the power to help me, none have panned out yet, which is very disappointing. If you were to compare my success this week to a car, I'd say I feel like my wheels are spinning faster than a Ferrari's, only the wheels aren't touching the ground so I'm not traveling anywhere just yet.
Some would probably think I'm just being impatient, but people need to understand that while I am a unique thinker for my age, I am a product of my generation. I grew up during a time where technology made it possible to get whatever you wanted in an instant, or at least a short amount of time. If you want to get some place, hop in your car and go. You want to buy something but don't have cash, swipe some plastic and pay later. What you want isn't in stores, have it shipped overnight to your home. Long point short, I grew up learning that it was easy to get most things with little or no effort. So this week I am learning that the amazing things in life, like your dreams, take time. I just can't wait to be at the point in my life when I get to say, "I'm here and it was all worth it".
As far back as I can remember my father always told me, "...It ain't how hard you hit; its about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward...", a quote from his favorite movie. So what I am teaching everyone this week is that I am an example of someone who never stops fighting for what they want in life; not only am I someone who can pack a wallop, but as anyone who knows me can attest to, I can certainly take a punch! I might stumble, but I refuse to fall, and if I do, I will certainly get up swinging.
The first two weeks' lessons were based on the way we think and the way we feel. This week's lesson is the past two weeks' lessons combined with action.
Reason #2- my nerves are
For those those of you but don't go off of vibes, the best way I can describe the nervousness I'm getting is this. Imagine going bungee jumping. They get you all set up, you climb
This week I'm learning different ways to gain happiness with the power of love. I used to think that in order to attract positive things or what I wanted in life I just had to think positive thoughts and believe I could get it. Nothing else. Now I see that in order to attract those things I need to love more and to especially love myself more. This is a different concept for me because I'm so used to self-sabotaging and doubting myself. In the past, I had countless negative thoughts a day and 98% of them were usually aimed at me - "I'm not this enough" or "I'm not that enough".
For those of you wondering, yes it is extremely exhausting thinking that way and I've learned that these past few days. My day used to feel so anxiety-filled because I would think of a lot of things I need to improve on - my appearance, career, talent, etc. I have no clue what I was thinking, thinking that way.
After my second session with Max, I began the affirmations we went over and I choose two ways to practice love and what a difference! Just a day or two saying phrases to myself, focusing on my good qualities, and even giving love to the negatives, my day is happier and my feelings and vibes are more at peace. Do I still have some of those annoying thoughts I need to get over- yes of course, but overall my past few days were very calm and I'm looking forward to many more!
All My Best,
In the first week we asked all of the participants to create a vision for their future. Anjelica wrote a fun and creative story about her vision for the future. We know that you will think it's really interesting too!
Here I am again working another dragging unbearable shift in the Cosmetic Department at Macy's. Rude customer after rude customer stocking drawers, wiping counters, and of course being at my managers beck and call. I can't wait until my hour break, its the little piece of heaven I get all day being here. As I help a customer the phone rings and rings and rings "Anjeliccaaaaaa!!!!!!" My manager yells "the phones not going to answer itself! Get it!" Of course I'm helping a costumer as she's laughing with her pals who are my co workers who are doing nothing at the moment. I go to answer the phone and it continues to ring and ring and ring and she continues to scream my name "Anjelicaaaa". I scream "ahhhhhhh!!!!!." As I scream, I wake up to realize it's my alarm going off and my assistant waking me up. "Anjelica, come on boss, we have a long day ahead of us and plane to catch." As I come back to earth I realize I'm in the same luxury suite my client's manager and team hooked us all up with for the tour. Wow, that dream was vivid and a little too real for comfort. All of a sudden I feel terribly sick. I run to the bathroom like a firework was lit under my ass and -Yuck! I vomit. After a solid few minutes of puking my brains out my assistant comes to check on me. "You ok girl " she asks with a grin on her face. "Yeah just peachy" I reply. "I have your kit and luggage all set for you; I'm all packed and ready to go, just need to get Starbucks on the way; I already called for the taxi. You have 30 minutes before we have to go. The rest of the team is running late so you may have more time" she tells me. I quickly get myself off the floor from my exorcist moment to get ready and still feel nauseated. I stop and take a few deep breaths just like Max taught me and suddenly I feel better . I stop and think "yup Max is a genius." I start to get ready and as I'm brushing my teeth and frantically throwing makeup on, it dawns on me how lucky I am and begin to remember how I used to struggle in between gigs, if I was even lucky enough to get two gigs in a row. When I first started out I only had two of each brush that I needed to complete a makeover, so before the next day I would be up all night cleaning my brushes from the job before to get ready for the next day of work -Pshh now I have so many brushes I can build a house with them if I wanted and if I did run out of clean ones before the next day my assistant cleans them for me. That's the perks of working on one of the top R&B/Rap artists of the industry. Makeup companies send me brushes and products like they're going out of style. My assistant and three other people just got done helping me organize my walk-in makeup closet back at my beautiful home in LasVegas, if you can even call it a closet, it looks like a makeup store. Drawers and drawers of eyelashes, an entire wall of eye shadows attached to a magnetic wall with every color imaginable; looks like a rainbow in the sky on a sunny rainy day. Foundation palettes stacked on foundation palettes, so wide and tall against the next wall it looks like the Great Wall of China; and can't forget my personal favorite-the lipstick rack. Every color you can imagine color coordinated from lightest to darkest. It looks like makeup heaven.
"Anjelica 10 more minutes!" I hear my assistant yell up. I scurry to put on my clothes, grab my purse, and before I jet out the door I stop take a quick snap shot of the suite- it was beautiful! Huge gigantic wide open space fireplace, tall ceiling, elevator, hot tub, pool, and of course an amazing balcony view. You would think that after being all over the world with my job that a "typical" suite wouldn't impress me anymore, but that's the difference between most people and myself. I always appreciate beautiful surroundings no matter how many I've seen. Every time I see a new one or one I've seen a billion times before I always look at it like its its my first time seeing it. As I snap back to reality, I grab my kit and luggage; my assistant grabs hers and the taxi is here for us, so we're off.
On our way to the private plane we pull through Starbucks. She gets her usual Soy Venti and as I'm dying for my usual iced Caramel Macchiato with extra caramel and skim milk hmmmmm so good; I sigh with a little bit a disappointment and order a hot black green tea my second favorite drink. Everything down to a drink order needs to be changed I thought.
After a few more minutes of driving we finally arrive with the rest of the crew. We're all pooped from the concert the night before. I can I see my client still has her makeup on from last night and even after 10 hours of being under bright lights and binge drinking afterwards, it still looks on point. Usually I would yell at her because it's so bad for your face, but I can see why she kept it on for paparazzi shots from the hotel to here. Finally the pilot comes out and tells us we're ready to board and the next thing you know we're all on and off to Dubai. Usually this would be an amazing time to pass out but I can't - once I'm up I'm up- so while everyone else is zonked out, of course I'm thinking.
This is probably the fifth time I've been on a private plane, but I don't think it'll ever get old to me. Cushy leather seats that feel like you're sitting on a marshmallow, the fluffy perfect carpeted floors, the mini bar stocked with champagne and of course the wide open space you don't get a regular flight. Again the perks of being the personal makeup artist to a top music artist. Wow to even be able to think that thought and have it be my reality is crazy. If someone told me ten years ago all this would happen I would have laughed in their face. I really have had such a crazy life. I have assisted some the top makeup artists in the industry, worked with amazing photographers, and now I am a personal makeup artist to a girl you see every where- TV, magazines, billboards, social media, you name it and I did her makeup for it. I have my light pink Range Rover, the car I've always dreamed of with custom maid Louis Vuitton leather impressed seats and a beautiful newly built house on the outskirts of sin city Vegas, paid in full and finally finished. When a bill comes to my house, whether it's $100 or $1000, I have the money in the bank to pay for it. I have more money than I ever thought I'd have in my life. When nosey people or beauty bloggers ask how much I make a year I always reply, "My bank account number looks like a phone number that's all you have to know."
As I stare out the window of the private plane, it dawns on me this will be my last plane ride for a little while, another thing that is going to change. I take a few deep breaths and finally go to sleep. As the planes has rough landing, I wake up. A few minutes later we all get off the plane and we're off to another amazing suite in Dubai. Once we get the room it's go time. The hair stylist is washing and styling her hair, the stylist ironing her clothes and packing her looks for the show and I'm of course going in on her makeup, making her look even more beautiful, if that's even possible. Three hours later and we're ready to drive down to the concert hall its show time.
As the opening act walks off, my client gets set and my phone rings, I look at my phone and oh wow this is it I go to answer my call. A few minutes later I come back with the hugest smile on my face. My assistant sees me "What's that smile for? Did I loose a bet?" she asks. "Yes! Yes you did! I having a baby girl! She hugs me and says "Congratulations! You always get what you want."
My first week on this journey was definitely a learning adjustment process filled with realizations and barriers. When I started coaching with Max and practicing this way of life, my emotions kept bouncing back and forth between being overwhelmed and having relief.
I felt overwhelmed because of the number of practice exercises and also because I never realized how hard it would be to change the way I think on a consistent basis now and for the rest of my life. I've read the "Secret" before, but I only tried some of things I've read here and there. This time it's completely different. I try every moment to stay consistent and it's hard. It's hard for many reasons, but for one in particular is that it was upsetting to notice how many times I self-doubted myself and how many times, even though I thought positive things, I felt differently. Then I would get upset that I got upset and had been put on a negative vibe.
I felt relief because behind the struggle I know this is what I need to do to better my life, I know I'm on the right path to my happiness.
The biggest challenge for me is going to be able to feel what I think but I just keep deep breathing and saying "In the past it used to happen, but who knows what can happen today and in the future".
I am Anjelica. I am 23 years old. I am a freelance makeup artist from Scranton, PA. As far back as I can remember I never felt like I belonged in my hometown; I never "cliqued" with the majority of people around me. I was raised with extreme values of loyalty and honesty, values most people I encountered seemed to lack. Because of my views and the fact that I marched to the beat of my own drum and didn't follow the crowd, I wasn't liked very much and encountered a great deal of negativity. This negativity definitely affected my attitude, my trust in people, and to some extent my spirit, even though I always tried to maintain positive.
I continue to strive to do the right thing. I genuinely try to be positive and work hard toward what I desire; however it seems that whenever I try to succeed or be positive there is always someone or something trying to stop it from happening; however it seems that the people who surround me who are mean and morally corrupt are constantly getting opportunity after opportunity, which totally baffles me. I know I possess the right tools to fulfill my dreams and be successful in my craft, I just need to be taught how to implement these tools so I can move and escape to a more positive life. I am so excited to share this journey of where my dreams will become my reality.
Anjelica's Submission Video